The type of woman I want to be

Originally written September 29 2016.

She has great posture, even when sitting in a chair five hours deep into a show she just discovered.

She does not stutter when she speaks, and has no use for filler words; no umms, errms, like erm, you know. She speaks calmly at a sensible pace, rations her words and enunciates perfectly. She does not stumble over her words or vomit all the words at once in excitement or nervousness, not even when she is trying to tell her friends a hilarious story.

She takes time to think before making decisions. She does not jump into things, neither does she take decades to pick an entree. She weighs the options and makes a choice. She never says “oh I don’t know” or shrug and say “I am so indecisive”.

She knows what she wants because she has taken the time to think about it. She has not left her life and the decisions up to the universe.

She is an effective communicator. She does not assume or expect others to assume. She is not afraid to ask for what she wants. She does not swallow her needs out of fear of inconveniencing others. She does not preface her requests with a thousand sorrys, and “if it’s no bother” and “well I understand if you can’t” and “you really don’t have to but…”

She does not need anyone to have her back, she has her own back covered.

She is not afraid to succeed. She does not fear the pressure that comes with success and does not shy away from opportunities. She allows herself enjoy the success. She is not afraid to fail either.

She is organised. Her dwellings are always spotless and she knows where everything goes. She never leaves until tomorrow what can be done today. She does what she has to do on time and enjoys the rest of her day with the peace of mind only a person not procrastinating knows about.

She lives an active meaningful life. She is not a couch potato. She takes care of her body. She eats good food and gets regular exercise. She never stays cooped up in her room for days, wasting away just watching television. She ventures out of her house everyday, if only for a few minutes.

She is not terrified of people. She does not turn down invitations out of anxiety at having to mingle. She mingles quite effectively and leaves a good impression.

She works hard. She plays hard.

She lives life. She does not waste time dreaming when she could be living. She does not waste time daydreaming about adventures she could be having in reality. She goes out and has them.

She loves and is loved in return.

She is a good person; a great friend, great daughter and sister. She never says “oh I am the worst at keeping in touch” because she is not.

She knows how to take compliments, and how to give them.

She listens to understand, not to reply.

She is rational during arguments. She understands that she cannot always be right and therefore listens to the other side of the argument with an open mind.

She does not believe in karma. She knows that waiting for a person to be punished by karma can be a futile experience. She knows that a person who has hurt another can go on to develop a fast metabolism and win the lottery while the one who has been hurt whittles away waiting for vengeance.

She is well read on a vast number of topics. She is cultured. She likes art because it is beautiful.

She sometimes breaks into a dance in random places: supermarkets, tube stations, Forever 21.

She smiles a lot, not in a moronic way or as a programmed response to awkward situations, uncomfortable conversations, but actual smiles. She laughs a lot as well. It is her favourite thing to do.

She is ha ha ha funny.

She is happy. She chooses to be happy.

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